Monday, June 13, 2016

Chasing the High

Yeah, I am guilty as charged…

Adyashanti speaks of this most eloquently in Emptiness Dancing,” Chapter 13, Spiritual Addiction. 

“A spiritual person can become addicted to spiritual highs and miss the experience of Truth.” 

“The spiritual person is very certain there is no problem, that his or her inebriation is unlike the other forms…” 

“You’re not a junkie.  You’re a spiritual seeker.” 

 “… I still believe I can pin the pendulum swing up to a high spiritual state and stay there.” 

“At the moment when the seeker starts to dissolve and there is just peace, then the pendulum might swing to into a high spiritual state or into a very ordinary state, or even to an unpleasant state, and the peace itself remains completely independent of those states.” 

“The nature of experience is that it changes or undulates like the wave on the ocean.” 

“As soon as the center is seen to be empty, and you know there is nobody there looking for it to be other than it actually is, this is much better than the highest of the high spiritual states.” 

“Without this me in the center, there is nobody to judge whether a given spiritual experience is the right experience or if it is spiritual.” 

Seems to be a central problem for many of us spiritual seekers. 
 
Whether we seek this peace through meditation, yoga, entheogens… 

I see this all around me… 

And within me… 

This little me. 

I want to be happy! 

I don’t want this unhappiness… 
This dissatisfaction… 

Yet, to be human is to be dissatisfied. 

This pushes us to create, to build, to seek… 

Yet

In the end… 

We have to let go… 

Let go of trying to get anywhere…  

To let go of being happy all the time. 

Clouds come… 

Clouds go…

Namaste




Friday, May 27, 2016

Meditation: Finding Exactly Who and What I AM.

Difficulty going to sleep.   Fitfully waking.

My wife and I are moving from the Midwest to the West. 

I am retiring from academic medicine after 25 years. 

I’ll join a private practice for about 5 years, or so... 

Make some money.  Pay off the house.  Retire again. 

Then, probably do some sort of practice helping people evolve… 

Maybe an entheogen coaching practice!  

The process of cleaning out 11 years of stuff is daunting. 

And tiring. 

My back hurts! 

And the endless forms for a medical license in a new state. 

Getting new hospital privileges. 

Blah, Blah, Blah… 

Worthwhile. 

My parents have passed on. 

Time to be closer to my wife’s aging parents.  

And the grandkids! 

Get our move paid for…  

Bought a smaller ranch-style house.  

With less yard. 

Blah, Blah, Blah… 

When I wake, I go and sit on my cushion. 

Why? 

Because

I forget who I am. 

What I am. 

And who and what I am not. 

What a long strange trip it’s been… 

And it doesn’t seem to be even near to being over… 

I am graced with much… 

A lovely partner interested in personal evolution. 

And the evolution of others… 

Practicing radical acceptance together… 

Enough income to enjoy life… 

Right livelihood… 

Blah, Blah, Blah… 

I forget who and what I am… 

So I go and sit on my cushion…  

And ask these questions… 

Fingers pointing at the moon… 

Over and over and over again… 

This body mind

Forgets… 

Sitting…  
 
Letting all these wants and desires… 

All these rejections of pain…  

All of this confusion…  

Fall

Away

Until

There is

Nothing

Left…  

I AM THAT

OM TAT SAT

Namaste




Sunday, May 1, 2016

What Lies Beneath

Most people are not interested in what goes on underneath the surface of the everyday mind.

Only when they can no longer function in their world do they perhaps start to pay attention.

Often there is a severe internal or external crisis that alerts them. 

A few of us are simply fascinated by what might be going on underneath. 

Arising from a deep natural interest in everything that is going on externally and internally. 

Not that we don’t have out little traumas. 

Feelings of disappointment may arise.  

Maybe even anger, resentment, desire, confusion. 

But, these feelings pale to those who have experienced significant trauma.

Or, for those who never learned the needed coping skills for successful every day living either due to genetics, environment, or both. 

My wife was at an MDMA-guide training this past week and they discussed Internal Family Systems Therapy. 

An interesting model for understanding trauma and possible protective mechanisms that may arise:  Exiles, Managers, and Firefighters… 

What we resist persists.  

What we feed persists.

Strong unconscious information needs us to pay attention. 

Otherwise it may tantrum. 

Sometimes it may show itself as cyclical thoughts, ruminations, about the past or future, which serves no purpose. 

Remembering the past helps us to make better choices right in the present now. 

Considering the future helps us to properly plan for events.

Yet, spending the majority of our time being present in the present, moment by moment, allows for clear seeing.

Intuition arises.

Compassion arises. 

Compassion for others and ourselves… 

There are many ways to access unconscious information. 

Internal family systems therapy is only one method. 

Meditation.  Shamanic journeying.  Dream work.  Free-association analysis.

Entheogen-work.  EFT.  EMDR.  Hellinger family constellation method.  Etc.

These are all directed toward dropping ownership of conscious and unconscious material that keeps you over-identified with small self. 
 
You are then able to view these thoughts of the past and future with some distance. 

Clear seeing is the big “S” Self shining through… 

Dropping, Dropping, Dropping… 

The quieting of the Monkey Mind… 

Over and over an over again…

Do not think of enlightenment as a goal. 

This is a lifelong process… 

The gift… 

Is life…

Itself… 

Namaste






Saturday, April 30, 2016

Present

Walking the

world

Sometimes

Sitting

Sometimes

Awake

Sometimes

Lost

Yin

And Yang

Light

and

Dark

Only

False

perception

Gets

In the

Way

Of

Clear seeing

Graced

By


Source…