The Three Commandments

In 1998 just after getting tenure.  I was compelled to start writing.  I was reading Neale Donald Walsch’s book “Conversations with God.”  I felt he got some things wrong, so I wrote a parody I called “Conversations with Dog.”  Here is the Introduction and the first part of chapter 9.  Maybe someday I’ll self publish it and offer it for sale. 

If you know me and want a copy just ask.  If you don’t know me, let me know if you want a copy, and I’ll look into self-publishing.  I’d sell it for minimal cost.   

Introduction

            You are about to have an extraordinary experience...again.  You are about to have a conversation with my dog.  Midnight is, I had thought, a very ordinary dog.  Yes, smarter than most.  At least dog smart, I had thought.  You have been taught to think that is just not possible.  You can talk to your dog, but she can’t talk back. 

            You may be right, it may not be possible.  Nevertheless, I have to write down these conversations.  I may get carted away to the local institution for medication and psychotherapy.  But then again, look what happened to Neale.  He got rich! 

            So I am willing to brave the naysayers.  Call me a blasphemer, a guru, or--perhaps worse--a plagiarizer.  These conversations happened to me. 

            The truth is always evident when we are ready for it. 

            This book will not address all the questions we have ever asked about life.  It will correct some mistakes that Neale made in his best selling book.  It directly addresses sex...I hope to spend a lot of time on sex.  Sorry folks, no photos or even line drawings.  This book will also address the hereafter, paths, and roads well worn and less traveled, but none of them will lead to God.  They sure won’t lead to the Devil either. 

            I have to apologize to Neale.  I never met him, but, I really did like his books.  I think he did a great job of trying to correct 2,000 years of misinformation.  It is just that there is information from my conversations with my dog that needs to be published. 

            Everyone who has read these words agree, all three of them.  Most of all I have to thank Neale, because without his books, I never would have thought of this title.  And, maybe my dog never would have started talking to me. 

            Perhaps when we are finished you will see the truth.  Naked and untouched by human hand, or canine paws.  Perhaps not.

            The truth exists.  You can find it in you.  But, as you will see, no one can tell you the truth.  You have to find it yourself. 

            I need to say now that I am--after reading the wisdom in this book--a lot less embarrassed by my own life.  I have been having fun.  I hope that you will have fun reading this little serious parody.  In the end, having fun is what it is all about.  I know that’s what we all need. 

            I’ll tell you about a few semi-serious “grown-up” responsibilities as well.  But that’s just all part of the path. 

9

So how does the reader know who is right, you or Neale?

            They can’t know what is the truth by reading any books.  They must look inside themselves for the truth.  Remember the truth cannot be known using words. 

What about Neale’s 10 commandments?

            I loved them.  The best part of his book.  A great start for any path.  He really relates the concept of material goods and attachment to them in poetic terms.  However, I don’t think he simplifies them enough.

Oh, so now you are going to rewrite the 10 commandments?

            No.  I’ll just summarize them.

                        1-There is only one Source.

                        2-Love everything.

                        3-Enjoy yourself.

Wait.  I get “there is only one source,”  and maybe “love everything.”  But, what is this “Enjoy yourself” business?

            Yes, “there is only one Source” is the easy part, most would agree on that.  “Love everything” is putting a positive spin on the injunction not to harm anything.  If you love everything, you have to honor your mother and father, not commit adultery, not covet your neighbors spouse or Porsche, not kill people, and so on.  That why “love everything” comes before “enjoy yourself.”  I agree with Neale, that all your actions must come from putting love first. 

So, you have to love everything more than yourself. 

            No.  You must love yourself first, you must fill your self with unselfish love.  Let that love overflow.  Then you can love everything.  Then take pleasure in this physical world, make money, buy toys, have sex.  But, don’t get attached to that stuff.  If you desire all that material stuff too much, if you put that first, you lose the true pleasure, because you lose number one and number two. 

So now we get to talk about sex?

(To be continued…)